what if our use of emojis gradually becomes so extensive that we actually circle back to writing in hieroglyphics
I asked my italian grandfather if the rough parts of Italy were called the spaghetto and he looked at me with so much shame.
do you ever feel like there’s just so many pretty girls but most dudes are just subpar like there are radiant goddesses everywhere and just piles and piles of guys in backwards baseball caps and sandals
it’s called makeup
you can put eyeliner on a frat boy that doesn’t change the fact that’s he’s wearing a neon muscle shirt and nike flip flops
- 3 episodes into watching The Office: goddamn I think I wanna bang the temp dude
- 15 episodes into watching The Office: goddamn I think Steve Carell's character wants to bang the temp dude
Do you think every president goes through a awkward first few weeks in office when they’re not sure when’s the right time to ask if aliens are real or not?
do u ever just remember your friends have genitals and get weirded out for a second
i hope iphone 6 is a flip phone
It’s 2 iPhones connected with a hinge and when you close it both screens smack together and crack.